How to ask for money instead of wedding gifts

The act of gift-giving stems from a place of kindness and tradition. Once upon a time, it was considered traditional to gift newlyweds belongings to help them start their new life together, such as homeware and sentimental commemorative tokens. These days it is common for couples to cohabitate prior to getting married, so these typical gifts may not be as helpful to modern-day couples as they once were. Unfortunately, asking for money as a gift can feel controversial, as some may not feel that this is a gift of true value.

Money can offer opportunities for experiences. Many couples would prefer a financial contribution to enable them to fulfil their honeymoon vision and travel to exquisite destinations for their romantic trip of a lifetime. But how do you ask for money instead of wedding gifts? We have a few helpful suggestions for you on how to approach this:

Include the request in your wedding invitations

Receiving a wedding invitation is often a positive experience for the recipient. This can be an excellent time to address the frequently topical wedding gift while your impending nuptials are on the invitee’s mind. Delicately stating your desire for money rather than belongings sooner rather than later may be better for both parties. Embed this information as a natural consideration for the event to ensure your inclination is registered.

Use humour

Making people smile is an excellent way to help gift-givers feel positive about a potentially uncomfortable subject. One way to approach this may be by including a clever poem with the guest’s wedding invitations. We have outlined some of our favourite wedding poems here. Laughter can break the ice, so this may be an avenue to consider.


Approaching the subject with sensitivity and fairness is paramount. Some may not wish to give you money, and may already have a gift in mind. If this is the case, it is generally considered best to be respectful and show gratitude for their kindness and thoughtfulness. This may not be the case for everyone, so do not feel discouraged. At you can define your perfect honeymoon and activities, helping people to understand your vision for their generosity.

Convey that a gift is not expected, but appreciated

Wording is key. The gift of money would be welcome, and your intentions for a financial gift would be truly cherished. Be sure to convey to your guests that while a gift would be gratefully received, the invitee’s presence at the wedding is your priority request.

Make them feel involved

Defining more of what the money will be spent on is a fantastic way of helping your guests to feel more involved in helping you towards your dream honeymoon. Simply gifting money may not be palatable to some, but what if they were instead asked to contribute towards a luxury hotel? A one-of-a-kind experience, such as swimming with dolphins or whale watching? Maybe their contributions would pay towards a deposit for a new home, or to allow you and your spouse to make your own choices on homeware.

Whatever your intention for the money you hope to receive, if you can define what you would like to spend the money on, it can help the gift giver to understand and feel a part of helping you towards your goals. This gives the gift true meaning, alleviating some of the discomforts the gift giver may have regarding your request.

Make it special

Spark their imagination with images of cocktail-making on a sandy beach, romantic boat rides or snorkelling with exotic fish in crystal blue seas. Beautiful sunsets, delectable meals and the vision of a dream honeymoon destination. If it is special to you, it will be heartwarming for your loved ones to know that they helped you to create these priceless memories with your life partner.

Weddings are about bringing people together; don’t allow money to get in the way of this loving experience. We can help you to bring everybody together.

If you are looking for a place to outline your ideal honeymoon, and the gifts your loved one’s financial contributions would go to, why not make a free account with us? Click here now to create your own customisable gift list. The best part? Gift givers can leave a personal message for the happy couple wishing them well on their adventures, offering further opportunities for heart-warming exchanges with every gift given.